Welcome to another post in my The Low Down series, where I give you the Low Down on important stuff.

I don't know about you but I feel like it seems to be harder to make friends as an adult. When you're at school or university, you kind of make friends with the people you see every day because you are all put into a situation together.

Since leaving uni, I have made a few new friends but it is a very different process. My friends from uni or childhood, I don't even remember how I made friends with them, we just have a friendship. So when I think of making new friends it's a bit more difficult.

Having said that, I feel like people as adults are way more accepting and open to new friendships, whereas school kids are kind of mean and form cliques. 

Tips for making friends as an adult

1. Network online

Through blogging and Instagram, I have met some really great people. You can find people who you have a lot in common with and it is a lot easier to approach people online too.

Obviously, making friends online can be dangerous with catfishing etc, so please be careful in doing this.

In Salisbury, there is a group called the Salisbury Social on Instagram where anyone is welcome to join social events including book clubs, drinks and more. Groups like this are great if you have moved to a new area and you want to make new friends because you're all in the same boat. 

Does your city have a group like this? If not, why not start one?

Related: Friendships: The Low Down

2. Put yourself out there

3. Don't be desperate

Wow, that is a long title! When I was telling people I was going it was such a mouthful too. Either way, I had such a great time that I had to tell you about it.

If you haven't watched RuPaul's Drag Race UK yet then what are you waiting for? You can watch it here on BBC IPlayer.

If you are unaware of what Drag Race is completely, then it is a group of drag queens who compete in challenges and someone goes home every week until they crown a winner. There are many seasons in many countries so if you haven't watched any, do it!

A fun fact about me is that I wrote a 10,000 word dissertation on the representations in RuPaul's Drag Race for my final year of university (and got a first which I tell anyone, any chance I get).

A bit of background information about the event

The queens

My favourite acts

At the end

This is a guest post written by Chloe from chlodoeslife.com.

You did it! You finally graduated and landed your first job. Life after university can feel very overwhelming and starting your first full-time job sounds scary, but I’ve created a list of amazing tips to help you navigate through your first job and be successful. 

Hi, my name is Chloë and I blog over at chlodoeslife.com. I graduated in May 2020 and started my first (corporate) job in August of that year. In the year and a half between starting that job and writing this post, I’ve learned a lot and now I’m sharing my tips with you. Thank you, Lauren, for giving me the opportunity to guest post!

1. First Impressions Matter

It sounds cliché, but it’s definitely true: first impressions matter. Make sure that on your first day - and every day after - you’re dressed properly and look neat. Of course, you dress according to your workplace - make sure you know beforehand what the dress code is. If there is none, you can easily wear jeans and nice jumper, but just make sure that you don’t look as if you’ve just rolled out of bed. It gives your employer the wrong impression of you.

Not only your outfit is important, there are a few other things to take into consideration as well. Make sure that you have everything you need to make your first day into a success. Take a notebook and a pen to make notes, bring some snacks and a water bottle if you’re not entirely sure your workplace will provide these. I wrote a whole post on how to rock your first day on my own blog, so make sure to check that out if you’ve finished reading here. 

2. Always Ask Questions

And you can take always quite literally. You just graduated and have only limited to no work experience, nobody expects you to know everything from the start. Even after months and after a year and longer, it’s still okay to ask questions. Nobody is perfect and even senior profiles still need help sometimes. It’s better to continue asking questions than make big mistakes that could cost you your job! 

You need to ask questions in order to be able to be successful in your first job. Finding solutions to a problem yourself is time-consuming and not efficient. Of course, you shouldn’t just bother your manager with every little inconvenience. I once read a tip online about the 20-minute rule: if you can’t find any possible solution within the first 20 minutes, ask your manager. If within the first 20 minutes you have a slight idea of how you could solve it, try that first. If that doesn’t work, speak to your manager. This way you don’t unnecessarily bother them and still find a solution in a timely manner. 

Related: 10 productive things to do on a Sunday for the best week

3. Take Additional Training

As someone who has just entered into the workforce, you naturally don’t have all of the skills you need yet to grow as a professional. Along the way, you automatically notice there are things you can’t do yet, and you should take every opportunity you can find to expand your skill-set. Not only for your current job, but any future positions you will take on in your career.

Most companies have a training budget available, so make sure you check in with your manager about how much you can spend yearly on courses. When you find a course that’s relevant to your job, talk to your manager to see if you can attend - you shouldn’t pay for these yourself. If there is no budget, there is also plenty of free training available online that will help you expand your skill-set. For example, some of the tools I work with or some of our business partners offer free online training on various subjects that I try to attend as much as I can. 

4. Learn To Say No

This probably also depends on the department you work in and on your individual skills, but as a new hire, people from different departments will ask you for your help, especially if you have one specific skill that might be useful for them as well. I, for example, speak German fluently, so the marketing and customer service departments often ask me to help with some translations. 

What’s important to remember, is that you make sure it fits in your schedule. Always do your job first and then see what you can do for other people. I know that especially in the beginning it’s very hard to say no to others, because you want to make a good impression, but you should always put the tasks you were hired for first. If a favour for someone else doesn’t fit in with your other deadlines, say no politely. Most of them will understand. This is super important to avoid any unnecessary stress and to not feel burnt out after a while. 

5. Stay In Touch With Your Friends

Nothing is more important than staying in touch with your friends. Even if you have less time now than you had before, find some space to squeeze in your friends for a drink after work every now and then. As a junior, you can feel very out of place sometimes, especially in the beginning, and being able to talk to your friends about it, can be a huge relief. 

It’s the perfect way to let out those frustrations that you can’t share with colleagues or family, because they simply won’t understand. Talking with people that are on the same level as you will make you feel understood. After all, most of them will be going through the same thing and it will help you feel less alone at times. 

Related: What now? A life after graduation

These are my tips to be successful in your first job! I hope you enjoyed them and that they’ll be useful for you in your job too. Thank you again, Lauren, for the opportunity and for letting me write a piece for your blog. 

Yours truly,

Chloë 

As my boyfriend and some of my friends are living in London at the moment, I am finding myself visiting there a lot at weekends so I thought I'd share some of the fun things I have been up to lately.

I feel like we have been a lot more drawn to Shoreditch lately as there are just so many cool and fun things to do there. Also, it means I can split these posts up for different areas of London rather than one big London one that I would have to keep adding to. So here are some of the fun places I have been to in Shoreditch lately.

Top 7 things to do in Shoreditch

1. Ballie Ballerson

Ballie Ballerson is a bar that has adult ball pits inside. Before going here I have to say I was dreading it a bit because I get really claustrophobic with things like that but it was actually a lot of fun. 

The balls get a bit samey after a while but you can go in and out of them as many times as you want in your time slot and they play some really good tunes at the bar.

I would definitely recommend trying here if you haven't already, it's just so different from anything I've done before and you can get some really good pictures for Insta.

2. Hijingo

3. London Cocktail Club

4. Simmons Bar

5. Swingers Mini Golf

6. Spitalfields Market

7. Box Park

Similar to Spitalfields, there are a lot of food stalls here but instead of being a market, it is just a place to sit, have food and drink and chill with friends. When you get there, you can scan a code on your table and order drinks to the table. When ordering food, you order at the table and they text you when it's ready to pick up to avoid queuing. 

Again, it's great to be able to all choose different things to eat and there is so much to choose from.

When I visit more fun places in London outside of Shoreditch, I will definitely write some more recommendations. Have you been to any of these places?

Related: 10 European cities you need to visit

Also, if you have any London recommendations for me, please let me know.

Welcome to another post in my 'The Low Down' series where I chat about important things. You can read the other posts in the series here.

What is it really like for me being in my 20s? 

What is it really like to be in your 20s? So far, I feel like it is THE decade of comparison. When you're a teenager, you do compare yourself to others but everyone is kind of in the same boat at school or college.

For me, after finishing uni was when the feeling of comparison really started. I compare my job to those of other graduates and I compare my life to those who appear to be way more 'adult' than I do. 

In the back of my mind, I know it is irrational to compare myself to others as we are all on different paths and want different things in life, and when I don't compare myself to others, I am pretty happy with how things have turned out for me so far.

When you imagine being in your 20s when you're younger, what you think it's going to be like and what it is like are two very different things, and this is touched upon further in the post too.

I didn't only want to share my thoughts in this post, but I wanted to share what it is also like for other people I know in their 20s too.

It was especially weird for me to spend the first couple of years of my 20s in the middle of a pandemic, it felt like there was pressure to go out and have fun, meanwhile, we couldn't do anything like that for a long while.

Not being able to do so many things that I wanted to do has just made me eager to make more memories, and makes me cherish the memories I already have. I am not going to stress too much about things because I feel like I have the rest of my life for things like that.

It does feel weird seeing people my age all at such different stages of their lives but their lives really have nothing to do with me. I feel like this new chapter in my life is for self-love, focusing on what I love doing and making lasting memories with the people who mean the most to me. Everything else will fall into place when it needs to.

Now, please take the time to read what it has been like for my friends in their 20s so far.

What is it like for others in their 20s?

Cheyenne Waters, 22

When I thought about starting my career in my 20s, I thought it would be easy. I thought things would be an easy relaxation into my future, but I soon found out that's not the case. There are lots of ups and downs and feeling like you're not doing enough or maybe doing too much, mixed with a constant fear that you're not living your 20s and enjoying being young.

For me, there was a constant fear after leaving university that I would need to be the most successful, making the most money, and achieving the most exciting job roles. However, I have found what I actually value most at the moment is my own time and finding myself in a busy city. 

I have found that sometimes, I prioritise my career over my own personal development and finding balance between the two is very important. I believe that my 20s is a time for self-expression and finding what you need in the future, and my advice would be to live in the moment rather than to focus too much on the future and your career as that is not the be all and end all.

Related: My journey to confidence - the low down

Maike Meyer, 24

Being in your twenties is a bit of a rollercoaster. The start of my twenties I spent mostly at Uni, a year in Amsterdam and half a year as a graduate working from home. I have lived in 3 different countries and 4 different places in the past half-year alone and that speaks for itself I think. Your twenties are full of change. New things happen all the time, things that throw you off guard. 

People come and go and I think in your twenties, you really figure out and learn who your real friends are because, let's be honest, University is just a happy little bubble but what comes after actually makes you realise who wants to stay in your life and who doesn't. 

My 20s have also consisted of a lot of my friends either going through breakups, getting engaged, married or having kids! Some even buy a house, move in with their partner, or out. But it seem's that change is constantly happening to me and everyone around me. 

So far, my 20s have taught me a lot, I have also experienced a lot, been through a lot of challenges and somehow, come through some of the most difficult ones of them. I think your 20s really might potentially have a massive impact on who you are later because of all this new stuff that is thrown at you.

But honestly, my 20s so far have been the very best time of my life and I'd say you just have to ride with whatever happens because it's all meant to be!

Maddie Cox, 23

I'm coming dangerously close to being officially in my 'mid 20s', which is a terrifying thought. Your 20s are such a significant chunk of your development. Your early adulthood molds you, pointing you toward the direction of your life.

Each year of being in my 20s has taught me something different, and some of the lessons can unfortunately only be learned the hard way (the crying to strangers in club toilets type of lessons). At times, it's been nauseatingly overwhelming. New people, places, losses, and gains happening more rapidly than you could've believed. But at other times, it's been the closest I have felt to being alive, present, and content within the world.

The only encouragement I could give someone heading into their 20s is to try and squeeze as much out of it as you possibly can. Take that risk, wear that outfit, move far away, do something stupid, stay up too late. Whatever it is, try and avoid being 'comfortable'. Comfort is the enemy of growth.

You have all the time in the world to stay in one place and be comfortable. Be selfish, think about what you want, and chase it with everything you have. At times it'll be scary, but it will be the most rewarding thing you ever do. - Good luck out there x

Annie Knight, 24

I feel like your 20’s are different for everyone, but are always a mix of some of the best years of your life and the worst. When I was little, I used to picture myself getting married at 22, buying a house at 24, and having kids at 25… obviously I thought 20-year-olds were much older than I feel now. In fact, I’m extremely far off of all of those things whilst others are less so.

My early twenties were full of youth, but now at 24, I feel stuck between continuing this life and embracing my youth in a big city and settling down in the countryside with a dog and a 4 wheel drive. I don’t think either is right or wrong, but navigating through this time is pretty tricky. But maybe that’s what being in your mid-20s is about - being confused and becoming ok with not knowing what you want from life…finding excitement in not knowing what the future holds.

Related: Friendships: The low down

Tash Evans, 22

I think being in your 20s can be a strange and confusing period of time but also one that should be filled with fun. I need to both figure out what to do with the rest of my life and give myself the time to actually just live my life and have fun. 

Having just graduated from university, there is pressure to know exactly what your next step is going to be. However, right now I'm taking the time to see where life takes me and really think about what I want to do next. A big thing for me is I want to have fun and try new things and experiences whilst I can. 

Your 20s is often a time where you don't have a huge level of responsibility and commitment and I want to make the most of that. I think my 20s will be a decade of balance. Learning and discovering myself and which direction I want my life to go in and I also want to look back on them as a time where I had fun and made a load of memories!

Tash's blog - A Girl With a View

Jasmine Burke, 24

I have always been a planner. I had a five-year plan from the age of about 15, and I would readjust it every few years based on my current trajectory. Then, I started University, and it took one singular semester for me to realise that I didn’t want a life like anything I’d planned. As a result, my descent into my twenties was the first time in my life that I had jumped in without any idea of where it would take me. (Which, given the last two years we’ve had, I suppose has been a good thing… There’s really been no better time to go with the flow.) 

I’m now four years into my twenties and it has been a strange and heavy mixture of tears from lonely moments, stress from essay deadlines, coffee stains from my stint as a part-time barista… The list goes on. 

The first four years of my twenties have blended into this weird mess of (admittedly, mostly negative at the beginning) thoughts and emotions that have forced me to really take a look at myself and think about who I am going to be moving forward. This is the first time in my life where I have been a “proper adult” where my decisions and my current state could stick with me into the future. 

I don’t have school anymore, I’m out of Uni, and while I still live with my parents, they aren’t legally in charge of me. For the first time ever, I am almost solely responsible for what I do and who I become. And, daunting as that is, it is also scarily liberating. I’m excited to see how I mould and change through my twenties: I want to relish in the decisions that I make and be sculpted by the people I meet and experiences I undertake. I feel like my twenties are a time for growth and change, and I am readily opening my arms to that.

Jasmine's Blog - Jas Writes Stuff

And there we have it. Being in your 20s is definitely a time for learning, making mistakes and just having fun.

Related: Being a nice person - the low down

Was there a particular story from someone that resonated with you?

I love making A-Z lists of things but it can be quite hard when you get towards the end of the alphabet. Full disclosure: I do not have anything for the letter X.

A while ago for Valentine's Day, I wrote an A-Z list of date ideas and because I love films, I thought I could create a list for that too. Some letters of the alphabet have lots of really good films starting with that letter, so for some, it was really hard to narrow it down. For others, there were only a few that I'd seen beginning with that letter. For example, I'm pretty sure I have only seen about three films beginning with the letter V, but S had loads I wanted to share.

The films in the following list are all films I have seen, enjoyed, and would recommend to you. If you need watchlist inspo, then look no further. There is a range of genres, some new, some old.

A-Z list of movies you need to watch

A - American Psycho

B - Back to the Future

C - Clueless

D - Do the Right Thing

E - Everybody's Talking About Jamie

F - Forrest Gump

G - Get Out

H - The Help

I - In the Heights

J - Joker

K - Knives Out

L - Legally Blonde

M - Mamma Mia

N - The Notebook

O - Only Yesterday

P - Prisoners 

Q - Queen of Katwe

R - Ratatouille

S - Schindler's List

T - Titanic

U - Us

V - The Vow (There are probably better films beginning with V but I have not seen very many beginning with V)

W - Wizard of Oz

Y - Yes Man

Z - Zootropolis (the only film I have seen beginning with Z but still cute).

There we have it, this list was so much fun to make so let me know if you enjoyed it and I can make more. There are so many films I would recommend and if you love films like me then follow me on Letterboxd here.

Letterboxd is an app where you can log each and every film you have ever watched. It's basically a social media channel where you can rate and review films and see what you're friends have been watching.

Related: What to watch on Netflix and Disney+

How many of these have you seen?

Welcome to my yearly roundup post where I share with you the highlights and lowlights from my year, 2021 has been a weird year, a lot has happened and although it hasn't been my favourite year, I have had some really good memories and some big changes have happened in my life.

My 2021 Roundup

January 

February

March

March for me was mainly filled with socially distanced walks with friends. At the start of the year, I would just complain so much about all of the things we couldn't do but those walks with friends were something I really appreciated and it made me focus on the things that we could do to bring us joy at that moment in time.

April

April is my bday month and I had yet another lockdown birthday and turned 22 but this one felt way less restrictive. I was able to see my boyfriend and friends and a couple of weeks after, Joe and I went for an outdoor meal to celebrate when things opened outdoor seating. Classic me to make it a whole birthday month. Stay tuned to see what I do for my 23rd birthday and if we are in lockdown again (my luck). If not, I'm going big!

Because outdoor seating started opening for restaurants and pubs and I was gagging to be anywhere but my uni bedroom, I went any time that I could for bottomless brunch or for food. But does anyone remember how freezing it was? I just remember thinking it was going to be warm and it really wasn't, I even had to wear gloves at one point.

May

So after all these months of writing my dissertation since January, I finally submitted it in May and basically finished uni. Throughout all of the other months, I was doing loads of uni work too but I didn't mention that because - boring. 

When I submitted my diss, I got the standard picture with the front page outside my uni. Only the front page - because we submitted it digitally rather than on paper, which I think is so much better anyway.

After finishing, I was invited by the National Express to go on a PR day out with them, so Joe and I went to London for the day on the coach.

We also went to a PR evening at Mbuntu's opening night in Southampton. So basically, I was feeling quite VIP in May. Uni was over, and there was a lot to look forward to re the world opening up.

June

One of my favourite days ever was in June, too. At our uni house, my two friends and me planned a sports day themed party at our house. It was the first party we could have at ours because of Covid and the people who didn't really like to party were away that weekend so it worked out well. It was so much fun and we did some classic games like egg and spoon race.

Another PR invite - My friend Maddie and I were able to try the lovely Greyhound Inn pub in Corfe. I can't recommend their pub garden enough, it was so stunning and there are great views of Corfe Castle.

Also in June, I spoke on the radio for the first time. I was interviewed on BBC Radio Wiltshire as someone who watches Love Island to talk about the new show starting. Big deal for me as I hate speaking on things like that.

July

July was the month I moved back home from uni which was a weird experience. It still hasn't hit me yet that uni is over for good and it's been months since finishing.

As nightclubs reopened in the UK, I was able to go to my first ever drag show, and see my fave Scottish Queen, Lawrence Chaney. I love drag so much and I hope to go to many more drag shows in the future, it was so much fun!

The day after (suffering from a hangover) I went on my first out of two student nights out in the whole of third year. I was so glad to go on a night out after months of not being able to.

This is the month Joe moved back to London for work too, so since then, we have been getting up to all sorts of fun things that I will let you know about.

August

After much anticipation on whether it would happen or not, my friends from uni and I went to Bournemouth 7s Festival. This is basically the event we look forward to every year and we couldn't go in 2020 so it felt even better to go this year - even if my feet did feel broken by the end of it.

September

At the beginning of September, my mum, grandma and I went to see 9 to 5 The Musical. Going to see shows is a newfound love of mine and I have really enjoyed all the ones I have been to so far and this was no exception.

In the middle of September, Joe and I went on a long weekend away to St Ive's in Cornwall. We had the best time there and this was the last of the sunny weather we had this year. Read about our St Ives trip in full here.

Towards the end of September, I visited Joe in London and we went to Spitalfields Market, where I had a pulled pork bun, and about a third of a crumble from Humble Crumble because it was so filling. After that, we went to a spontaneous comedy show at Vauxhall Comedy Club and had a really good night.

October

I also took my friends from home on a night out in Bournemouth. We went to DYMK which is the gay club in Bournemouth as I had such a great time there seeing Lawrence Chaney earlier in the year.

November

I haven't stopped going on about this, and I'm not sure when I will but I graduated from uni in November, and this was probably the best day of the whole year. It just made all of the days of hard work and feeling like I couldn't do it pay off.

After graduating and celebrating with my friends, I also had a party a few days later to celebrate with my family friends at home. In true Lauren Kenny style, we had a huge brie centerpiece.

Another month, another visit to London, but this time it was to see my friends. We celebrated one of my friend's birthdays by going to Hijingo in Shoreditch, which is basically a really futuristic boozy bingo. I am yet to win anything at a boozy bingo - I'm starting to think it's a fix.

Towards the end of November, I just started getting into Christmas activities early, like Christmas shopping and going to the markets for mulled wine.

December

To kick off December, I was invited to a PR meal at Pizza Venti in Salisbury where we tried their amazing Christmas menu. The pizza was to die for!!

I also went to my first book club meeting. I have been a part of the book club since September but there were various reasons why I couldn't attend the previous ones. It was really great to meet some new people in my home city.

As I said, I also try to share the low moments as well as the highlights, and in December, I spent a lot of time feeling really anxious. I have spent a lot of time trying to improve my mental health and going out of my comfort zone, but what I was hearing in the news about the new waves of Coronavirus made me really worried because of how much I struggled in the previous lockdown.

At this time of year, we usually go to the Dortmund Christmas markets but this year we went to the Birmingham one instead.

All in all, the year has been filled with highs and lows just like any other year. Has it been the best year of my life? Has it been the worst? Not really. A lot has happened that I'm grateful for and that's why I really like writing these posts. At first I thought this year had been a bit rubbish with Covid, but looking back through the year, I have some really fun memories and lifelong achievements that I am proud of.

What are some of the highlights of your year?

This year for our annual Christmas market trip, we decided to go to Birmingham as it was easier to stay in the UK. We were planning to go to Dortmund as we had in 2018 and 2019 but going would have meant we'd have had to isolate over Christmas while waiting for PCR tests and it just wasn't worth it.

Instead of not going anywhere like last year, we decided on Birmingham as the market looked like the best one in the UK from pictures, and it is run by the same people who run the Frankfurt one, so it was very German.

We only stayed in Birmingham for one night so we traveled up on a Sunday, got there around lunchtime, and started exploring the market. 

When we go to Germany, we usually focus on the food and drink on day 1 and then the shopping on day 2. There may have been too much focusing on drink on day 1 that led to not that much hopping on day 2, but we were all just excited to be together celebrating when we couldn't last year.

I really enjoyed my time at the markets and it seemed a lot more authentically German than other ones I've seen in the UK. However, I feel like this market was more about food and drink and less about shopping stalls as there were only a few of those. 

Related: Dortmund Christmas markets

As the UK is not really known for its Christmas markets, it isn't difficult to beat the other ones in the UK in my opinion. I haven't yet seen one here that is better than Birmingham but if you have been to a really amazing one, I'd love to hear about it!

Incidentally, I have been to the Bath Christmas markets before and they have a lot more shopping stalls than anything else with less food and drinks if I'm not mistaken. However, there is not much of a market in Bath this year. 

With the food in Birmingham, there was not much to choose from in terms of what to eat, but there were plenty of places to get classic Christmas market food like Bratwurst, chips and mayo, and Frikadellen. 

Does it compare to German Christmas markets though? Absolutely not, German markets at this time of year are unbeatable, the UK just can't compete. Having said that, I am really glad we went to Birmingham and we all had a lovely time so it is definitely worth doing as an alternative.

We stayed in the Jury's Inn hotel which was pretty cheap for one night too! All in all a fun couple of days. It was also my first time going to Birmingham and I'd love to go back, it is amazing for shopping.

Have you been to any UK Christmas markets that you enjoyed?